You’re doing everything ‘right.’ Showing up. Ticking the boxes. Keeping all the plates spinning. Basically you’re doing all the things that you think are expected of you, plus some, because you’d rather exceed than meet.
But if you’re honest? You’re tired. So very tired. Some days, you just want to hit pause. Or run away from it all completely.
You’re starting to wonder whether this version of “success” is what you actually want because right now, it’s not exactly fun.
You’ve worked hard to build a career. Maybe even a business. On paper, things look good.
But beneath the surface, there’s a quiet fear: If stop – if I really stop – will it all come crashing down?
The hustle myth
We’ve been taught that high performance means being always on. Push harder, do more, rest later. Sleep when you’re dead.
You’ve probably seen the slogan on gym walls: No pain, no gain.
But if I had to choose between getting somewhere fast and arriving in one piece, I’d pick the latter—every single time.
Coincidentally, it’s the same advice we’re given when driving.
There’s no finish line worth crawling over if you’re too wiped out to lift your head for the medal. Wouldn’t you rather pace yourself so you have the energy to remember that moment?
High performance isn’t about speed. It’s about strategy. It’s about building in intentional rest so you can stay in the game—focused, consistent, and well.
Somewhere along the way, “busy” became a badge of honour. The default answer to “How are things going?” became “Busy!”
Pity the person who says, “Slow and easy.” You wonder what planet they’re from.
But that badge comes at a cost: your time, your energy, your health, your relationships.
In coaching conversations, I see it all the time. Smart, capable, driven people stuck in overdrive. On the outside, they look composed. But underneath? It’s a different story—tight schedules, frayed nerves, and a quiet sense that something’s about to give.
Is it worth it?
So what is high performance – if it’s not the hustle?
Let me be clear: I’m not saying don’t work hard, or don’t push yourself. Pushing has a place.
Stretching, striving, aiming high – these things matter if you want to grow and develop. But push without pause? That’s when things unravel.
True high performance isn’t about going flat-out all the time. It’s about knowing when to lean in and when to step back.
It’s about alignment, not just acceleration. Showing up with intention, energy, and focus—without running yourself into the ground.
And yes, with a little self-compassion too.
That means:
- Doing work that aligns with your values and strengths
- Prioritising recovery just as much as delivery
- Creating space for things that require deep focus, not just reacting to what’s loudest
- Saying no with clarity, so your yes has weight and meaning
- Speaking to yourself the way you’d speak to a friend.
High performance feels calm and clear, but not chaotic. It’s powerful, but never frantic.
What high performers do differently (without burning out)
So, what separates people who perform well and feel good, versus those who feel like they’re at breaking point?
It’s not about having more time or more talent. And it’s definitely not about being better, smarter, or more colour-coordinated than everyone else. What I notice in high performers who are doing well, and will continue to do well is that they’ve learned to work with themselves, not against themselves.
They:
- Get clear on what really matters, and let go of the rest (without the guilt)
- Shape their days around energy, not just a packed calendar or overflowing inbox
- Ask for help before things hit crisis point – they know they don’t have to have all the answers
- Build in time to rest, whether it’s planning holidays or carving out small moments of stillness during the day
- Treat recovery as a non-negotiable part of their performance.
They still work hard. They still care deeply. They’ve just stopped pretending they can do it all, all the time. They know they’re enough as they are, and they’ve stopped feeling like they have to prove it.
You don’t need to earn your rest
Somewhere along the way, we picked up the idea that rest is something we have to earn. Finish the to-do list, hit the deadline, prove your worth, then and only then can you rest.
It reminds me of something simple we heard as kids: “Eat your veggies, then you can have dessert.” That message stuck with us. Good things only come after we’ve done the hard stuff. No wonder we feel guilty when we rest if we don’t think we’ve done “enough.”
Whatever “enough” is… because that “hard stuff” or work, whatever you call it, never really ends, does it? There’s always another deadline, another goal, another mountain to climb.
So if you wait to rest until you arrive, you’ll always be running.
Stress and rest need to go together like breathing in and out. Pushing hard needs to be balanced with recovery not postponed until you “earn” it.
Think about elite athletes. They don’t train flat out every day. They build recovery into their programs because that’s what makes them stronger, faster, better.
The same goes for us in careers, leadership, business, and life. Rest isn’t a reward or a finish line. It needs to be built in as part of the journey. It’s about pacing yourself so you can show up clear, focused, and ready for whatever comes next.
Redefining achievement
You don’t have to hustle harder to prove your worth. You don’t need to run yourself into the ground to be valuable. And you definitely don’t have to do it all on your own.
High performance isn’t about endless busy-ness or pushing yourself to the ends of the earth. It’s about showing up, consistently and intentionally, for the things that matter most to you.
It’s time to rethink what achievement really means. Let’s make success about clarity, purpose, and balance. Quiet, steadfast achievement. Not chaos and exhaustion.
When you lead yourself this way, something shifts. You give others permission to do the same (I explore this idea more in my blog on “Setting Boundaries at Work Without Guilt” You create a ripple effect – normalising a healthier, more sustainable way of working and living.
Because showing up well for yourself isn’t selfish. It’s leadership.
And like all leadership, it’s easier (and more powerful) when you don’t try to do it alone.
If you’re ready to lead yourself differently — with more clarity, energy, and purpose — I’d love to support you.
👉 Book a free Action Game Plan session with me.
We’ll get clear on where you’re at, what’s getting in the way, and what small, strategic steps will help you move forward — with focus and intention.
Because high performance shouldn’t come at the cost of your wellbeing. Let’s make it sustainable — and yours.
About the author
Josie Askin is a high performance and productivity coach, speaker, and the founder of Spring Coaching. She works with driven leaders, business owners, and teams who want to achieve more—without burning out in the process.
With nearly two decades in government and advisory roles, Josie saw first-hand the cost of chronic overwork and the pressure to always be “on.” Her work blends evidence-based coaching, lived experience as an athlete, and practical strategies to help people lead themselves—and others—more sustainably.
Through tailored coaching, workshops, wellbeing programmes, and facilitation, Josie helps ambitious people make meaningful progress with clarity, energy, and purpose.
Keen to stay connected?
Follow Josie on LinkedIn, or head to www.spring-coaching.com to book a free Action Game Plan session and explore ways to work together.